There are occasions that demand our attention
Like needing to pee! (Whisper…) Some won’t even mention
But we know the truth. The fuss and the muss
Soggy situations that we must discuss!
Men take a leak, but women just tinkle
Guys shoot a stream. Ladies just sprinkle
Gals must sit down – boys get to stand up
Visit the doctor, both pee in a cup
It’s often an issue when traveling by car
Needing to whiz before going too far
Search for a bathroom goes on without end
Roads without rest stops? I can’t comprehend
There are medications that help stop the flow
Then there are others that help make us go
This is big business. There’s money that’s made
Our bladders are bonkers, so they’re richly paid
There’s never a line at the men’s room, it’s true
But ladies must “hold it” until they turn blue!
That is not right. No, that is not fair
They should not have to wait for the porcelain chair!
If some laugh too hard, they may have an issue
Sneeze, and they drizzle. Quick grab some tissue!
Wake up in the night, and you have a great need
It’s just 30 minutes since the last time you peed!
Dogs have it easy. They can go in the yard
But finding a restroom can sometimes be hard
Have you ever decided to just pee outside?
Admit it – you have! Or else you have lied!
Crossed legs, the urge, the panic, the fear
Hope against hope that a bathroom is near
That third cup of coffee might not have been wise
You’re now seeing yellow with both of your eyes!
A forty-ounce drink is a big bladder buster
The race for a toilet leaves you in a fluster
Desperately searching for someplace to pee
When you can let fly, you’ll shout out with glee!
Locked restroom door means you’ll start to tap dance
You’ll hop up and down, and you might even prance!
Hogging the bathroom is thoughtless and cruel
What’s really disgusting is to pee in the pool!
Plan for emergencies well in advance
Wearing multiple layers is taking a chance
Just one broken zipper could be a disaster
You’ve got to gain access! Go faster! Go faster!
But as you grow older, the problem can worsen
And you’re not as spry as a much younger person
The race for a restroom could be quite a squeaker
And if your bladder gets weaker –
You could be a leaker!!!