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Christmas time is about to arrive
The test will be if we can survive
Tis the season. HO! HO! HO!
Family is coming. NO! NO! NO!
YES! YES! YES!
They came upon a midnight clear
Car crammed with folks, let’s move from here
They just showed up, no invitation
Joyful spirit – some deflation
Aunt Martha intrudes, and there’s Uncle Bob
And all of their kids, it’s like a huge mob
Where will we put them? This is all wrong
We have no room for an unruly throng
Ornaments are hung on the beautiful tree
The cat tips it over; she’s on a crime spree
House decorated. The lights are in place
Our home can be seen from orbit in space
No bourbon bonbons for dear Uncle Bob
His sobriety is way too easy to rob
Can’t have the candy, no matter the giver
He has a sweet tooth that goes straight to his liver
Children can’t wait for Christmas to come
They believe the North Pole is where all toys are from
They have yet to learn the horrors of shopping
The shocking amount of money we’re dropping
But in the end, we believe they’re deserving
Creating memories that will be worth preserving
An expensive gift for our child, and WE WIN!
But instead, they play with the box it came in
For Santa, they leave milk and cookies, a treat
Homemade with love, extra sugar so sweet
Hypoglycemic the big man is not
With all of those calories – he’s hit the jackpot
Family and loved ones, it’s such a delight
To keep everyone calm and break up all the fights
Aunt Martha unhappy. Uncle Bob has passed out
Third box of candy is what did it, no doubt
Enjoy the season and be of good cheer
But don’t take a shot at the flying reindeer
Better to stick with traditional turkey
Santa is no fan of venison jerky
Moon glistening now on the new-fallen snow
Til the dog is let out because he has to go
Round yellow splotches will quickly appear
It’s better the snow than the carpet in here
The gift-giving starts. It gets worse every year
Open the presents, force a grin ear to ear
Day after Christmas, you’ll take back the crap
Wrong color and size! Want a hat with ear flaps?
Under the mistletoe, you’ll get a kiss
But if it’s your cousin, it’s just a near miss
There’s fussing and fighting and plenty of spite
Step around Uncle Bob he’ll sleep it off overnight
And so Christmas season has come, and it’s gone
As always, we wonder where did it go wrong
We’re all left exhausted, the house full of trash
The dog ended up with some kind of rash
He’s dragging his butt all across our new floor
And that is a difficult thing to ignore
But as always, we hope for better next year
Can it get any worse? That’s my greatest fear!!
Poetry At Play 